Mine Battery Hath Died | Medieval Knights Tech T-Shirt

Charging into the 21st century with 12th-century flair, our "Mine Battery Hath Died" t-shirt depicts a noble band of crusader knights united in history's most timeless struggle: finding a charging cable when thou art at 1%. This premium heather gray tee features an intricately illustrated heraldic shield design with armored knights bearing red-crossed shields, standing valiantly beneath an ornate blue decorative sword. The medieval-style banner proclaims their modern plight in authentic old English font: "MINE BATTERY HATH DIED. FETCH ME THE ROYAL CHARGING CABLE!" Perfect for demonstrating thy superior wit in any realm, digital or physical.

TECHNICAL DETAILS

• Premium 60% combed ring-spun cotton, 40% polyester blend
• Pre-shrunk to maintain perfect fit through many washings
• Reinforced double-stitched seams for durability (these knights are built to last)
• Medium-weight fabric (4.3 oz/yd²) for year-round wearability
• Tear-away label for maximum comfort
• Heat-set to prevent shrinkage (unlike medieval tunics)
• Ribbed collar that won't lose its shape
• Taped neck and shoulders for extra durability
• Available in unisex sizes XS-4XL
• Screen printed with eco-friendly, high-density inks
• Heather gray base that pairs with chain mail of any color

BACKSTORY

Born in the creative smithy of Technium Foundry, this design emerged when our resident historian accidentally left her phone in the staff microwave (don't ask) and proclaimed these exact words upon discovery. The ensuing laughter sparked an artistic quest to imagine how medieval knights—those champions of preparedness who never left home without sword, shield, and full body armor—would handle the modern anxiety of battery depletion. The knights depicted represent the Order of the Depleted Battery, a fictional brotherhood sworn to maintain connection at all costs. Each intricate design element was meticulously crafted to blend authentic medieval heraldic traditions with the thoroughly modern desperation of power-hungry smart devices. The blue sword represents technology's double-edged nature, both connecting and disconnecting us from our surroundings.

PERFECT FOR

• History buffs who can't navigate without Google Maps
• Tech enthusiasts with a weakness for Renaissance faires
• Anyone who's ever panic-searched for an outlet in public
• Office knights battling the daily crusade of corporate life
• Gamers who understand both the struggles of Dark Souls and dark screens
• Gift-giving occasions for friends who appreciate both history and irony
• Medieval reenactors with a healthy sense of self-awareness
• Professors who want to seem "hip" to their students
• Anyone who prioritizes both style and wit in their wardrobe
• The friend who always asks to borrow your charger

• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
• Dark Heather is 65% polyester, 35% cotton
• 4.5 oz/yd² (153 g/m²)
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Quarter-turned to avoid crease down the center
• Blank product sourced from Bangladesh, Nicaragua, Honduras, Dominican Republic, Haiti or Guatemala

Disclaimer: Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.

Age restrictions: For adults
EU Warranty: 2 years
Other compliance information: Meets the flammability, lead, cadmium, phthalates and formaldehyde level requirements.

In compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), Technium Foundry LLC and SINDEN VENTURES LIMITED ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at gpsr@sindenventures.com. You can also write to us at 2201 Gibson Rd., Jacksonville, FL 32207, USA or Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.

Size guide